letter from mommy: month three

Dear Bohdan,

I think you will be a lawyer, because just after your two month birthday, you learned how to play. You were in your swing with the stuffed puppy that mommy’s friend Regina bought for you, and you discovered that if you touched the puppy’s ears it would make this neat-o crinkly sound. Regina was reluctant to give up the puppy because she too was fascinated by the crinkle, crinkle. Apparently she amused herself by scrunching the puppy’s ear the whole day she had your gift at her office even though she was supposed to be litigating with torts or escrows or some silly business like that. Lawyer Boh. Commuting mommy’s family’s and daddy’s friends’ jail time since 2032. The business card has a nice ring to it, no?

This month you also graduated to Stage One of your Big Boy Bed (to your crib from your bassinet). Even though I think you are old enough to start sleeping in your own room just fine, mommy made daddy take the whole crib apart so that he could set it back up in our room. It seems I can’t fall asleep if you don’t lull me to dreamland with your beautiful breathing - the most wonderful song in the world. (And I might just be a tad bit lazy, preferring to walk three steps to stick your suckie back in to plug your pie hole rather than 10, but this is supposed to be a beautiful letter to my first born, and so make everything rosy I will.) We will soon likely put you into your own room though, because I think you’d sleep through the night longer if I didn’t rush to you every time you hiccupped (I actually don’t, but I sound like a more attentive mommy by saying I do…everything’s shits and giggles, remember?). The Baby Whisperer will make the final decision on this one.

Boh, you continue to make me feel like the luckiest gal in the world (and now I am NOT just saying that…I mean it with all my heart). I love how you sometimes can’t fall asleep unless I rock you in my arms and sing to you. I love how you sometimes don’t need me to do this, too; you’re an independent little soul who makes mommy look like she knows what she’s doing because of how easy-going you are. I love the feeling of your hair in between my lips when I’m snuggling with you and kissing the top of your head (oh! My heart just skipped a beat as I re-read that sentence. I can feel my arms wrapped around you and your thin, blonde little hair in my mouth right now!) And I love the smell of your tummy. Some people like the smell of their babies’ heads, but I’m all about your tummy (mmm…baby Boh tummy! It's tummy-licious!)

I’m learning so much by being your mommy, baby boy. Like that life is all about choices, and that the best choice for me to make is family. And like that time flies too fast, so it’s important to appreciate the moment you’re living in because tomorrow will come soon enough. And like that new moms are full of words of wisdom and unsolicited advice that they desire to pass on to other new moms and moms-to-be every single chance they get, and I could hardly pass up the opportunity to do just that in today’s letter, so here goes:

1. Going anywhere with a baby takes twice as long as it does without. If you’re in a rush, it takes three times as long. (And maybe even four times if K. has told you to be there by six OR ELSE.)

2. The funniest sound in the world is that of a baby farting over a baby monitor.

3. If you want to stop a baby from crying, turn off the baby monitor. (Works every time.)

4. The invisible lobsters that pinch babies while they’re sleeping so that they wake up freaking out while mommy and daddy are trying to relax on the deck with a beer and spend some much needed couple time together NEED TO BE SHOT. (And then served up with butter to mommy and daddy so that they can delude themselves that they can go on dates again.)

5. Bohdan really does mean “gift from god.”

6. Even when you think it couldn’t possibly get better than it is, and that you couldn’t possibly love a human being any more than you do, it does, and you can.

7. Superman could have crushed Lex Luther without so much as breaking a sweat if only he too was able to unleash THE AWESOME POWER OF THE BOOB.

Still loving you so, so, so, so, so, so, so much,

Mommy

P.S. Oh yes, and on June 29 you laughed for the first time. It made my heart smile.